Mar 10 2009
Unsolicited Advice 4 the Men in the DC Metro Area
Why are you invading my personal space?
It seems that some men in this area have NO idea how to talk to you and NOT invade your personal space. They move in sooooo close as if they are feeling a vibe. UH UH, back up! Just last night I had to tell a 40++ year old man that he was IN MY SPACE! He didn’t seem to notice or care. He said: “I have heard that I can be ummmm, what’s the word?” So I gave him a l ist of my observations in the 15 or so minutes we had “known” each other: rude, annoying, invasive, abrasive, loud, imposing? He said he liked the way imposing sounded. I said, “That figures.” He came up to the bar at about a 10 while everyone else was about at 7, then as he began introducing himself and talking to people at the bar, he kicked it up to 15 & then 20- touching, leaning, laughing close, talking closer. He seemed oblivious to his invasive ways. at one point he was LEANING on my friend as he talked to the woman next to her, so much so she couldn’t move her arm to finish eating her food. I am shaking my head at the thought. Of course when I informed him he was so close she could not eat, he got close to ME.
This is not an uncommon occurrence, people getting too familiar too quickly. I have been known to do the same, but only when there is a vibe. And apparently some men cannot sense when there is no vibe & they are much too close for comfort. Here is how to tell:
- If you lean in to talk to her & she leans back; you’re too close.
- If you place your hand on her arm, back, leg, etc. & she looks down at your hand and stops talking; you’re too comfortable.
- If you are talking to her, giving her your BEST Billy D. & she seems to be staring JUST over your shoulder; there is no vibe.
- If you give her a nickname before you even know her name & she looks at you like you just called her a b¡+¢#; there is a problem.
SIMPLE, YES? It astounds me how common courtesy just isn’t that common anymore. Respect me, respect my space… plain & simple. Simple & plain. If you wonder why the woman you are talking to has an attitude, maybe it’s you. Maybe you are too close, too loud and too familiar too soon. Just because a woman doesn’t want to be called BooBoo by a someone she just met 5 minutes ago, does not make her uppity. Just because a woman doesn’t want your arm around her AS you introduce yourself, does not make her stank. Just because a woman asks you why you are talking SO loud, does not mean “she thinks she’s like that”. These are ALL real scenarios & they ALL happened LAST NIGHT! Yes, a grown man told me that I think I am like that. To which I replied, “Yes, I am kind of a big deal!”
Gentlemen of the Metropolitan Area, I challenge you to respect a woman’s space this week and see how far it gets you.
Ok? OK!
